Thursday, December 4, 2008

Be this not depressing?

FLUNK. It is.

I lost NaNoWriMo, naturally. I had 45000-something words. Not too destructive to my image (so to speak), but I had planned to get up to, naturally 50000 words. I wrote 9000 words in one day, however, and on Thanksgiving... I wrote- *wracks brain* -about 6000 words, I think. Anyways, I'm an utter failure, and now I'm not allowed to write a long, nice old novel that makes sense. I lost words to write before I could finish the 5000 last words. It was quite a failural moment.

Eek! I wish I could go ahead and learn how to make Civil War era clothing, however much I have to hand-stitch, machine-stitch, do weird lining things that are hard and cause your whole project to go to utter ruins, and all that very, very fun stuff. I admit, it isn't really not fun, oddly enough. I mean, funnn.... what is fun? Anyways. It's all drastically interesting, and so I want to do it! Yay!

*bounces around wildly* Today has been a both exciting and non-exiting day. Naturally, I was tired this morning, got out of bed at 9:15, had to translate Latin before class in the scanty minutes before it ('tis at 10:00 on some days... like today), and translated dreadfully, getting all the subjunctives mixed up, and translating datives as accusatives. Arrrg. :)

However, for some unexplained reason, I am not utterly and hopelessly in the well I'm falling into! I must have been given a book, because now I'm much more active in my mind in happy ways than I was before. And I'm happy for that, even though it'll likely go away in about... ten minutes. Or at 10:30 when the internet turns off, and I will be torn away from all my dear friends whom I can only talk to over computeriness and phones. I don't like to use phones, nor computers. Evil things. I'd rather be cooped in a parlour writing letters on a dear wooden writing lap-desk thingy, which reminds me I was going to show me sister the writing desks I found on some Civil War-y site. They were the wonderfullest writing kits ever; the crazy writer's dream!

Or else, wonderful enough for me. Kind of like how I'd rather have a nice 34-string harp with carving on it than a plain, but nice-sounding, 29-string harp. Mweh heh.

Oh, gracious. A link! I must be spared. I suppose I'll have to go find one. ;)

Ok, a revelation for the day. For one thing, the past three (including this) paragraphs start with 'o's... and I have 2211 objects in my main folder. Who knows how many other things I have within the file-folders in my main folder... on la computerish thing. It's insane. Ridiculous. And all my fault.

Of course, the abundance of photographs and pictures of many sorts are very helpful to me, so it's not really useless, I mean, I actually learn things from staring at pictures on the computer and in books and just randomly lying about. Like, about different styles of clothing, mostly that sort of thing. And Hungarian embroidery. And looms.

So, I am learning many languages in many different ways. My mostly really being learned ones are: Old English, Hungarian and Latin. Latin not because I was forced to learn it so I could read the Latin Vulgate Bible, or however you please in spelling and capitalizing it (I generally call it the Latin Vulgate with my mouth and mind and brain), but because I wanted to. I could have learned Spanish or French, you know. But I chose Latin and Old English my first full-fledged high-school year, you could call it, and this year I continue Latin (for Old English was a one-year course, in fact, half-year, except my teacher made it one-year because it was intensive and all) and one of my friends is teaching me Hungarian over the internet. And it is a lovely language. All interesting and East-European.

Now for a link of folksiness. I think I only half folk harp done up in the document so far, but who cares. I will probably never get to Irish fiddle and concertinas until I run out of links.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ChO61Y3NGw8&feature=related
I don't think I posted this. However, it doesn't matter if I did, because I'll never find out, having this computer as slow as it is. Happy for you, happy for me. We can be satisfied.

Good-bye, and good-night!

Friday, November 28, 2008

My plans.

When I am done with NaNoWriMo, if I shall ever be (I am behind, at 30003 words out of 50000), I want to do some stuff to 'get loose'. Well, that's how other people put it, but I would just say, to rest.

I want to embroider things, possibly, but my mainest concern is to knit and crochet different odd things; I want to learn more complicated crochet patterns (so to speak), and make myself a wool hood, with some sort of fabric inside so it doesn't poke too much.

By a hood, I mean a winter hood, all warm and thick, with tails that could wrap around my neck or do some other thing, to keep warm.

I should also crochet a nice, long, wide scarf. Wide... somewhere around 1 1/2 feet wide. Long, possibly four feet. I am serious and plan to be ready when it's January and February and it wants to go down below zero. Oh, and leg warmers. Probably knitted tightly, so it doesn't breathe so much. I used to knit really loosely, but sometime this year or last I got used to knitting however I wanted to, and to try to keep the same width of knittage, so to speak.

I am not using the useful terms you know.

I also want to make a big, crocheted shawl.

http://www.thegracefullady.com/civilwargowns/images/cdvs/winterwear/ladyshawl.jpg
Which I found on http://www.thegracefullady.com/civilwargowns/ , when I was looking at different photographs. Yayy, I love Civil War dresses. I used to think I wouldn't like them, just because when I was really little, I was insane about them, and as I got older my true passions seemed to come out, or obsessions. But, apparently, I have studied them more and like them more than I did then.

Here are some crochet patterns-or-whatever-they're-called I found 'long the way:
http://dayna.tdgservices.com/ShowPattern.aspx?PatternID=40
http://crochet.about.com/library/weekly/aa072598.htm
http://crochet.about.com/od/eightinchsquares/a/sbsq8in.htm

I hope the links work. I was thinking I could practice those pieces, and then after learning how to do particular parts of them, make weird things from that. I need to practice somehow. ;)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0YzSx9P_QlM&feature=related

This should be what I wanted it to be. Rather nice little thing, whatever it is.

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

bang.

I have pointless subjects, right?

Let's see what I manage to put on for folksy music stuff.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_GAMZ6rO_NE&feature=related


I am learning Hungarian now. One of my dear friends is teaching me, and I'm glad of it. But I can't say anything yet, except some numbers. And I feel stupid about it because I might be dreaming I know it.

In any case, there isn't much well to be said, except I broke my eyes yesterday reading Shakespeare's Richard III, not to its discredit, and had to make cookies and listen to David Copperfield, read by my mother. I like that book, even if the Jenii doesn't. Let it be.

Personally, I feel as though I've spent my life on math, Pirates of Penzance, and not sleeping well. Happy day, happy life, for I haven't good to say. Should I write you a poem?

No, I can't. But I could write my NaNoWriMo story.Yes. Did I tell about NaNoWriMo? Well, I'm not finding out now, for I'm lazy.

Good-bye. Go get stuck in a water barrel so I don't have to write any more pointless posts. Mweh heh heh.

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

A prayer request

Please pray, if you ever see this, anyone, that my arms and hands don't do too bad- I have eczema 'round my hands, up to my elbows about, I think, maybe farther... and it's rather reacting now in the winter dryness.

Also, I'm rather depressed. I need prayers on that that I get cured and happy... I'm much better on blogs when I'm happy. In fact, I'm brilliant when I'm happy. :) So I ask you to pray, so that I can be brilliant and write stupid poems again...

and sorry there isn't a YouTube thing on here. *fishes one up*

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XVVDUj6B8pg
Like this one a lot, listen to a lot by these two peoples and Grainne Hambly. That is, if I find them, and if I don't go head-first after another thingamabobby. Grainne is one of my liked Irish names, too... but I like so many it's hard to count. It means 'grace', and something else I forgot.

Well, school goes on as it didn't ever do. I about went mad over my math today, and got angry at my siblings about ten-thousand times because I can't be patient and contain myself... due to my brain's rewiring, I think. That's why I'm depressed. And my arms hurt... my elbows I notice more because I use them so much.... paiinnnful. They're all swelling and red and scalish.

:)

Pray ever and evermore. I hope my blog isn't a blot of useless bogginess. I'm the glummest thing in the house right now because it's very hard to smile or laugh... and I look like I haven't smiled for about ten years. Honestly. It really surprises me. I think I should write on my blog more; I'll try. I'll try to say something interesting. If I try to force things out of me, I may get happier about it. Pray, pray, pray!!! Pray if you may!

*disappears most flashingly in a spray lucis (of light, in Latin... ah, Latin, it haunts me!)*

Monday, November 10, 2008

Veni. Vidi. Nunc scribo.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7-KZpSZVSJ4&feature=user

La Partida. Figure it out.

Well. I have come back from sublife. Or at least, a way of.... living that is rather sub. Does that make sense?

Well, of course not. I wonder what I should say.

I think I should post because I have an obligation to post if I make a blog. However, if I do post, what I say will be utterly pointless. Most overrated phrase.

I suppose I can only ask for those of you who view this to pray for me because I'm doing rather badly. I'm quite deflated. And there's not much to be said because it's been said.

So, ta-ta for now. The shortest post? Likely.

*edits randomly* I do not fail to recognize after viewing ancient photos that Noah's hair is very different from how it used to be. Much darker and deeperish. And he's way... differenter. *disapperas vaporically*

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Say No To Sickness

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pgV1rIHuhqM&feature=related
Earl of Denmore, Iggy and Squiggy, Arthur's Seat
Scottish + jigs = pwn.

My brainwashed mind wants to gather a few very cool conservatives and make a cute politically incorrect blog. It would be wonderful. And we could sell, well, very-cool bumper stickers.


I'm afraid, y'all, that I might be getting sick. More of a permanentish sick. It's so gradual that it might be able to be remedied before I REALLY get sick... but it seems to get worse and worse every day. Just subtly, but it seems that I am getting sick. It's weird. I think it's because of mental run-down and failure to sleep well. Prayers would be appreciated, as some wise scholar probably said once.

Hence the moral of my blog. Say no to sickness. Instead of 'Say no to war in Iraq', I say what I said. Yes, that's kind of what sparked the idea of a politically incorrect blog, not that I haven't thought of something like that for years now.

Anything interesting? I think I may not take speech; I'm so tired and so run-down, as said above, that I don't think I can. It's enough to wrap my mind around the simplest math in the world, and around weird Latin sentences.

I am taking art classes, math, Latin II, English Lit, and anything I really can find out. Life is a whole book to read and learn from. It's so beautiful to see that, and it's so interesting to live, but somehow now I loose that interestedness I had not too long ago and now, life seems so blank, and dark. It's all strange. But for those of you whose lives aren't blank and dark, remember that even if you're not taking biology, you're probably learning more than you'd ever learn in biology today. Or at least, be willing to learn. It's worth it.

Well, that was a little more optimistic. It sounds so much like Nostalgia that I want to write now.

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Returning...

I had sewing yesterday at six o'clock. It was better than I thought it would be, and I got more done than I thought I would. It seems that I like to do learning-to-sew with people who have done it or many things... because the teacher just sized the patterns of us students by our measurements. It's sooo easier. Although, we don't yet know if they fit. But who cares?!

I've decided I'll post one link to a harp thing I like on YouTube... each post. If I remember and can. I have a document of links and descriptions, and so I can post one today (I haven't got very extended internet on this computer).

Here is a hornpipe, The Golden Eagle, which was one of the first I found back in the early days when I started really wanting to play Celtic harp...:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OlC0bsO6L6Y&feature=related

Tell me if it's not what I think it is, so I can get the right link.

And I have lots more! I really like harp these days, and hope someday to get a nice 29-string F-F Sara harp from Hobgoblin Music.... or whatever it's called. It's down a bit south of here, and they have a little shop somewhere else in Minneapolis. I got to hear the harp and see it, and I want walnut. I love walnut. :)

There's lots of political mysticism out there these days. As some of you may know, my family hears a lot about random things... generally we listen to the conservative talk-show hosts. Anyways. I can't help squelshing listening to some of it because people take many of us conservatives wrongly. Personal note of randomness. You don't have to pay it the least bit of attention, or you can go and comment a big rant on why conservatives are brainwashed. *g*

I'd probably say I was brainwashed if you asked. I prefer to think I am because it makes life more interesting and insane.

So, how about some weird poem from my story, Nostalgia. It isn't published so I won't tell you much more until I want to.

Stories told under my candle here,
Near the fireside, at night.
Stories, tales, from the past
Are told without man’s spite.
I know them now, so mild the night
That day would leave away,
But it is calm to see by light
The knowledge passed from day.



No name. Hope you liked it. ;)

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

...

I'm posting again.

I've edited previous posts, because I think they're an insane jumble of insanity.

And I want you to read this bit of what I wrote now, and tell me what you think. In fact, it's all I wrote of it. Just comment. Like we're in a club exchanging our writing.
--

In It All


Isn't it odd how most stories start with something odd? It could be almost imperceptible, but I think it's always strange, out of the ordinary. In this way I introduce a story that is strange, about a time that became strange, that likely does not exist.


Ailis was tapping the floor with her foot. Her eyes were simply glued to the piece of paper she was reading; just one, but with all sorts of strange symbols, she thought. The English alphabet seemed not to make sense any longer; the characters blurred, and when they weren't blurry, they didn't make sense. But Ailis didn't have anything else to do, so she continued to ponder the strange letters, the little squiggly lines between paragraphs, the odd straight line across the top and the bottom.

They didn't make sense. The words didn't make sense. She knew the words, but they didn't strike meaning in her mind.

Why? How could she think about the blurriness, and not see the words? Words formed in her mind, but the words on the page remained curves and sticks of dry ink.

Life was incomprehensible; the words of Ailis's thoughts became unreal, too. She couldn't understand them, but they kept flowing, flowing, flowing. The more she didn't understand them, somehow, the faster they came.

Ailis took her pencil from the side of her desk and wrote in the left margins, 'Incomprehensible.' It was the only word she understood, and she began not to understand it.

--


By the way. The format's messed up. Many thanks to it.

A case(s?) for sanity

If you plan on damning a book, (as in, telling people it's a bad book and they should never dream of reading it) I would suggest reading it first. There are some books I may try to read but not be able to finish, but I've kind of decided with myself that I'll read books before I say they're bad to anyone.

It may be that I hear reviews from people whom I trust (such as, on the da Vinci Code and some others, although I may end up reading those sorts of books anyways), I may use that in my own opinionizing, but just reading articles and reviews can be misleading.

Whatever is said by the person you're reading will be moored, in its own way, to that person's view, whether they're crazily for the thing or terribly against it. I probably would only trust someone whom I believe I can trust, which is a stereotype that is hard to define (let's not go into that).

(Just off the top of my head, I want to give a little credit to the talk-show host I'm listening to now (with some of my siblings), Dennis Prager; I generally trust him on most things, although I disagree with him. I think it's almost completely impossible to utterly agree with someone on everything. :-) --random note--)

Where I got this from here is the Harry Potter issue- how people go around saying they're evil books when they haven't even read them, or when the person (in my opinion) is completely biased (no offense to some people I know; I'm not directing this at you).

Please, I'm just saying. I don't believe the Harry Potter books are evil. I may not agree with everything J.K. Rowling says and believes, but her books have a good moral, and... I believe they paint a very real image of humanity and some abstract things. And I think J.K. Rowling is very brilliant in how she goes about her writing.

Now, may I depart, having said what I meant to say... God sie mid þu, oþþe eow.

Tuesday, October 7, 2008

A little bit more

Right now, I'm listening/kind of watching the debate between McCain and Obama. Yes, I'm nice and biased. Actually, I don't think I am. And yes, I'm conservative, therefore I'm rooting for McCain... but I'm too young to vote.

Well, on the political bit, I think Sarah Palin (I prefer to just call her Sarah) was a wonderful choice. There are so many reasons... but I find, I can trust her, and I agree so much with her; she's honest, she's to-the-point, she's very friendly, and she's a good and wonderful person. Ooh, and Alaska's beautiful, but that really doesn't have much to do with it. I can't say Illinois is beautiful, though, because I've only been to Chicago and that doesn't give much view.

La, la, la.

Well, my hair's growing! I think it grows faster than a half-inch per month. Not sure, though. But I... like to be optimistic. *g*

I'm afraid Obama is one of the people/things that make me nauseated, if I can't control myself. Pantheism and some other things are with it... worms in potatoes. Well, worms in potatoes make me imagine there are worms in any food I'm eating. Blood, however, doesn't seem to be one of the things that makes me nauseated. Except that I feel as though I shouldn't not be nauseated when I see it, or think of it.

I made cookies today; chocolate chip cookies, and had way too much chocolate, and likely batter (as I delight in calling it), too. I only let the kids and myself have two cookies today because I don't feel sugary. In fact, I generally don't. Sometimes I just prefer having more sugar than salt at a moment, but that's momentary.

And I had my first real mocha frapuccino yesterday, at Starbuck's! Yessir! I loved it. I got a tiny, weeny taste of it in California, though, at a store. Except, we (my mum and I... and Grandma) were drinking our stuffs outside, and it was windy, so I was shivering. If you don't know, frapuccino is a cold drink. Brrr.

Coffee's not bad. Also first real time of having coffee. I don't think I'll be a coffee addict, but it's not bad. *grin*

Laaatin.

I want to make a new blog for designing ideas-- clothes and all sorts of other things, things to be made. And post lots of pictures. Only problem is, some of the pictures I want to post I got from other sites, although they're not really those peoples', so... I'm not sure I should really post them. In the past few days I've been going through lots of sites getting design pictures and stuffs from them for my ideas. That's what I do sometimes. It's a good way, and I can access them well to look at them and study them whenever the time be.

However, I'll never know where the pictures are from. Except that they are probably from other sources, and therefore not really the persons.

Tell me if it matters, so I can be settled and happy.

Thursday, October 2, 2008

A Chronicle of My Life

Well. I have just decided the doom of YouTube. Here is the narrative:

A Tale of Death and Doom

'I WILL KILLLLL!!!' yelled the man with the black cape.

The bloody scimitar is raised.

It clashes down upon the victim which stops.

Muffled wails are heard penetrating the deep meditativeness of night.

Then silence invades.

Through the subtlety of this thing, you might get the idea. I'm not sure how it fits in, unless it looks like a man in a black cape and really is me in a turtleneck shirt looking like a turtle.

But really, I could feel the scimitar going down. CRASHING onto YouTube. May it never be naughty again!

Chocolate sauce and ice cream!!! Mmm. ;)

So. Before I disappear into the distance forever, I will show you two poems... I wrote them last night, just before bed. ;)

It's so amazing, just how long
Nostalgia's been with me!
No one sees me as I am,
Except those long deceased.
Each sad day is lonelier still
Than the one before,
Though somehow I still gain hope
And pass from hour to hour.
--

So many days I have on earth,
And yet nothing to do;
I live my life, and watch the sun
As it drifts beyond.
In the night I watch the moon,
Watching where it goes,
And yet my thought is oft the same:
I've nothing to do.
--


Anyways, my family and I are going off to see the Biden/Palin debate. I hope I'll enjoy it because I'm awfully sleepy.... and I might go to sleep.

I'm wearing my ancient last year's winter shoes... and my toes go right to the ends. I think I'm going to have to get new shoes this year. ;) Nice brown leather shoes because black doesn't exactly match me, and white.... well, it's an old story why I don't really wear white now. It is because when I was a girl, I mussed them up, and so I had to get black and brown but not white. And now, I prefer brown, and have originated an interest in it. Yessss.

And it is really a longer story; I am just feeling brief. A good sign.

So, it's in the fifties and cold, and in eight minutes we goooo. My days are so busy now.

God sie mid eow!

Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Something sensible? I think not.

Have you ever seen the movie, 'Meet the Robinsons'? It's a good movie.

And by now, you may get the idea I'm taking a shot at movie reviews. There are lots of good movies to review, and I generally go better if I review the ones I like.


'Meet the Robinsons' has nice, funny, eccentric people in it. That is a good reason to watch it.

It's so classic in itself, the movie; it's simple and the characters are good, the storyline is good, and original. I find it very hard to see original movies. In fact, most of the bad movies I hear about seem to be centered on something else; they're not from the director's mind, or the writer's mind, or so on. I can't say whose mind it would be from, because I don't know much about movies.

It also has hilarious parts. Or at least, funny. I don't know whether you'd find one part as funny as I do, but I thought it was pretty good and funny. However, in all its funniness, it is somewhat serious, and has good points, and morals, and gives you a good big of whatever to think on. There's love and friendship in it, and the characters aren't all hoity-doity lovely and stuff. They like different things, such as, the main character, Lewis, is an inventor. And he's just a kid, and like a kid, he starts out inventing little things, but... it seemed to me that the movie was somehow saying, though things seem to be little and pointless, they're really very big and wide.

I'm not sure how to keep from spoiling the movie, so I am not going to say much more about it. I just think you could try to see it, if you have time, and if you can... and by the way, which I haven't mentioned, it's animated. I'm so used to watching animated movies, I don't even remember it when I tell about them; sort of an afterthought.


I could also say about Wall-E, but I have the feeling that all I want to say is already said.

I loved Wall-E a lot, as well. It explained true friendship, and honesty, and love... and I suppose many other things, too. I don't know how much I can say to get you to go see it (which you can do in theatres now, and it's worth it, methinks...), but I found it a charming movie. One of those lovable Pixar things.

I'm not sure how to touch on other things. It goes out into space, and whenever I get into that sort of part of a book or movie, it makes me feel uneasy and even sad. Alien, different. So I'm trying to white out those feelings while I write about this, and it can be hard. None of you really know about it, but that's why I had a hard time enjoying Star Wars back when we first watched it. I'm so used to it now that I don't mind so much.

Well. Not to scare you away, but there's also a rather darling cockroach, or I think it's a cockroach (and we Bertilson kids have debated it for awhile... I think Gabriel said it was a cockroach, and he is generally trustable), and Wall-E is... great. I don't know. Wall-E being the main character.

Well. I think I shouldn't go into farther detail. Those are two movies I saw this year, Wall-E we saw in Utah, on the way home (sort of), and Meet the Robinsons we saw here in our home, and have listened to it about ... twenty or thirty times since, and I'm not joking. It's very likely it was that many times.

I'm going to search for some sort of poem to browse on, preferably my utterly random ones about cutting pumpkins for Halloween, which I think I wrote last year, in October or September.. or maybe I wrote it in December. *g*

Ok. I've been dawdling, but here are some poems for the meantime, while I search for the pumpkin one. I may not find it because I have an endless maze of files, but I'll work on it.

This was inspired by a mention of whatever's called 'Thou Shalt Laugh'. I think it's a book, but I don't remember. Go look it up if you want to know; I think it's easy enough to find.

What People Tell You To Do

Thou shalt laugh, big and wide;
Thou shalt laugh the whole world dry!
Thou shalt laugh, big and fat,
Thou shalt make an obtuse laugh!
Laugh thine eyes from flowing brook,
Laugh thine eyes from darkest nook!
Thou shalt laugh, big and wide,
Thou shalt laugh the whole world dry!

Thou shalt wail, when thou diest,
Thou shalt wail the great world wet!
Thou shalt wail, when thou liv'st,
Thou shalt wail an acute wail!
Wail thy hair from tight abode,
Wail thy hair to suck the moat!
Thou shalt wail, when thou diest,
Thou shalt wail the whole world wet!

Thou shalt sing, piggishly,
Thou shalt sing like silly thing!
Thou shalt sing, piggish-like,
Thou shalt sing a largish sing!
Sing thine ears to hardest place,
Sing thine ears into its face!
Thou shalt sing, piggishly,
Thou shalt sing like silly thing!

Thou shalt scream, loud and clear,
Thou shalt scream the whole sky's snow!
Thou shalt scream, loud and great,
Thou shalt scream, lik'ning to a bear!
Scream thy mouth so large and wide,
Scream thy mouth so very white!
Thou shalt scream, loud and clear,
Thou shalt scream the whole sky's snow!


Oh, my. More random poems. Here:

Like a lion, he stands above,
His noisy mouth is coming down,
Crashing through the air!
You try to run, but he’s faster,
And down his jaws to the ground.
He growls louder, coming after,
Seeking for your fear,
Then you think you’re in a bush,
And safe from lion’s jaws,
But soon you find a giant frog
Has got you in his mouth!



Oh, I love old random poems. This will probably be a huge long post of it. Have fun.

I wonder how to do this,
Because it is so lame!
I never found out how to write
A silly poem in the night!
But now it’s day and cloudy is,
The skies, falling to the end,
Falling from their crooked place
Up in the sky with such grace.

Swaying, falling, dipping clouds,
But too bad I’m not with them now!
What can you write if it’s today,
A parody or Santa’s sleigh?
I don’t mind to write Latin,
Because you’ve got choice vocab’lary,
But then you get all bored,
And down you sit and roar.



Here's a more melancholy poem. I am pretty sure I wrote it in spring, once the grass came out.

I am old, I have no comfort,
Darkness pulls its shade 'round me.
Singing songs, I pluck my harp,
But darkness envelopes me.
A shadow comes across the stars
And beauty now is lost,
The green of dew-cladden hills gone,
The flowing waves of sea.

In the night, a star will flicker,
Once it flickers, then goes out,
Then the darkness pushes at me,
A darkness hiding the sun.
In the morning, cool with mist,
I raise my head and see the sun,
It rises in the distant east
And ends its roam near night.

Wand'ring, lonely, across the plains,
Life emerges as a song,
The birds let out their morning voice,
And mist arises from the ground.
I wander through the crisp new grass
Coming to a large willow tree,
There I sit down, to have my rest,
For I travel through the night.


I must have written this during Old English or Latin class last year. Insanity, beware.

Old English is not Middle English,
Beware 'tis not Shakespearean!
People get it mixed up, confoozled,
The poor thing, O that alien!
Like Latin 'tis or not at all,
People don't get it once or all,
They fall about upon their swords;
Why does Rette know its call?


I found it. Well, I already told you about it above. It said in the original document that the first line was written so because I was scanning through my art pictures. Delectate (which probably isn't real Latin; I can't remember the word)!

The Pumpkin Song –

November/December art pics are on the show.
Do just kill them, one by one and simply let it go.
I don't care however it's done; just let it get done,
I don't care whether you use a spoon or a latex glove.
Just get it done and go away and put it right outside.
Cut little holes in its sides to indicate its eyes,
And maybe just an imprint showing where is its mouth.
I don't care whether everything goes wrong or right or both;
It doesn't matter 'cause this is just one experiment.
Either shoot two holes at it and make two faces, ha!
It doesn't matter what you do; just let it slip right through.
I might give one little hole through its nose to show...
Or maybe I'll just shout a word to demand it right done.
But anyways, with a gun you shoot out holes for mouth...
And some weird fangs with icicles because it's cold outside.
Taste it up with hot light; a fire or a dove,
Doves are loud and fluttery, and may shine through their eyes.
I wonder if we should put a necklace on its top;
A wired chain or weird hand like Frankenstein's monster.
But anyways, we'll put it out on the steps with sign for formation,
And maybe Great Pumpkin will pass by and bless it one by one.
(Erm, you see, it has fac's two and two fangs, with ice'cles floatin' 'bout,
That sets stage for wondrous shows of binoculars.)
And so the children'll pass by and be scared right to death!
Mwahaha! I'll laugh to death and put on an ugly mask.



*bows*

Monday, September 29, 2008

A few thoughts.

The start of another week, with a nice day at church. I love my church, and theology.

Today, I got to have the combination of cottage cheese and fruit cocktail. Mm.

I played the piano. Right now, I'm perfecting Burgmuller's Arabesque and one of Clementi's Sonatinas well, and fooling around with Haydn, Bizet, and other composers.

And I think I can hit High C in singing. Whoot.

Now, I'll try to touch on something happy. Embroidery: I have interesting ideas. I'm making myself an outfit for our church's Reformation Party, a skirt and top, and I want to embroider something somewheres when 'tis finished. They were ok, and it was interesting. Now I know just a few ways to change it so that it is better.

Have you ever noticed how apples have character? It's very interesting. I find the nice, crisp ones are rather the kind... well, intelligent ones. And have you ever had the tasty real apple cider? The spicy stuff? I like to fool with it, and IT'S OUT THIS YEAR!! OH YAY FOR FRESH APPLE CIDER! Sometimes it's even Minnesota-made!!! *ceases vigil*

Art class on Thursday. I think I got tired sitting around so long, but it was good. We're doing grid drawings. I'm drawing a picture of three tree swallows sitting on a barbed wire fence, or what ought to be one. Rather cute, and I hope my drawing will turn out. I'm very picky about how things look.

Enough. Let us hope no spiders come to bite me this night. Yes, that is what I worry of last night, ever since I was bitten 'tween the fingers and my eczema exploded angrily against it. :) I like to use weird words.

Sunday, September 28, 2008

Upgrade.

I am guaranteed be random in this post.

I'm searching for clothes (patterns, online) to wear every day, and to church... and now I'm looking at costumes at Folkwear.com . They have nice costumes. And a niiice cloak. I want to make myself a thick, scratchy woolen cloak to wear in winter instead of the freezing plastic ones from stores.

And I want to make a wool coat-thing. I think that, if it goes down -20 or so this year (or next), I'll want that. And I am realising I don't like winter so much. Too much cloud, which makes me feel cold. And so I wish I had a large enough blanket in bed to curl up under. :P

I think I'm going to make a shot at a silly Latin rhyme or poem. One of my friends and I were conspiratorialising about writing a nice Latin rhyme book with other Latin students we know. All this was inspired by a Latin rhyme her teacher (and also mine, but that's confusing, because he's not teaching me Latin yet, but will probably be next year) quoted in class.

Something about non, numquam and ne, I think. I can't remember. I don't know all the negative little words in Latin yet.

I went on a rant, sorry. :P

And now I can't think of a Latin word because my brother is humming Ratatouille music beside me... and it's the best (I think) track of the disc, so I want to start... doing something weird like running around the house and singing in Old English or something.

Oh, well. I give up. I can't write Latin-advising poetry now. Won't come. You have to have the Latiny inspiration, the awareness of all the strange participle forms, the forgetting of what letter is the, well, principle letter of the first conjugation, and you forget what... 'est' means. That's when the inspiration comes driving through, and you begin to fluently speak to your siblings in Latin, or compare some Anglo-Saxon words to Latin ones... and lecture on their similarities, and their common ancestors in Indo-European.

I *love* languages. ;) But right now, I'm not doing good at writing in general. I hope you enjoy this drizzle of nouns and verbs and articles, and I'll go wander away and do something pertaining to my character.

*edit* The name of this post doesn't have anything to do with reality.

Friday, September 26, 2008

...

This has been a busy week of my life. I am going to have art classes every month. It's somewhat intensive; we had the first class this week, yesterday. We are doing grid-drawing. I'm doing a little picture of three tree swallows, Gabriel says they are. He's doing a goldfinch.

I am also doing sewing now. I will be doing a class at a store which, incidentally, is near my church. It's funny that it's so close, because when we go there, I keep thinking we're going to church. Just not the right times of the day. I'm making a skirt and soon a shirt for dancing, and then for the class I'm going to make a rather... mediaeval-style dress, except they didn't make dresses like that in the mediaeval times. I researched that awhile back.



I think that my first weeks on blog may be very ambling. I am an ambling writer. If anyone has read some of my writings, which many of you may have (I don't expect many people who don't know me have seen this quite yet), you will know. Sometimes I'm actually quite witful and sometimes not. I mean, I think of some odd words and use them, straight from my head, and you can tell when I do that. I actually like it myself. A bit of originality, and a bit of fun. I love words, and languages, and histories and cultures. Unless they drive me nuts. I also love to learn about worldviews, but pantheism makes me sick. As does superstition. It really does make me feel nauseas.

I will now drift away.

Videbo te altero tempore! :P

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

A change of mind

I don't know. The name up there is very random, but it might come out to bring sense.

Maybe I should write something philosophical for this post, or something un-philosophical. I could elaborate on translation and reading of Anglo-Saxon poetry and prose, or tell you how I liked Bede's account of the conversion of King Edwin. I read it this morning for English Lit, you see. Indeed, Bede is genius, although my friend gave me a haunting idea on him. Not that I'm surprised by it, but it makes me feel as though I'm sinful to read and like his writings. Not to mention randomly read and translate them in Latin.

I could ask you now if you think I use the word 'random' too much. I think I do, but it's such an interesting word, as is 'odd'. They are both very much attractive to me; they explain me, and things I know and have, so well. There are so many like words, but I won't go and write a dictionary of them, because it might end up being the whole Oxford English Dictionary, or something.

Words are words, and they are so important. Some fail to recognise the very immensity of the language of literature, which is words, and their meanings, and what they can mean. And my sister, who is in this house, is being very odd and pointing at me with a strange expression on the part of her body which is highest from the ground in general, unless she tends to be like Mr. Addams of the Addams Family show. Insane man, he.

I find so many areas of life interesting. I think that to understand me, it would be good to understand that. In fact, it may be necessary to, at least in some form or manner, rather like other things that could serve as metaphors or similes or something odd that my mind can't manage to think up. Nice long sentence there that makes no sense and which you will stumble on, or won't. But I think I would, so you probably will, because I'm stumbling on it now.

I LOVE CHOCOLATE.

:) Thank you. I had two chocolate cookies earlier, very recently, wonders. With milk. Mmmm.

I will try to cease from such vigil in the future, but it helps to know me. I do love chocolate, at least, I like it very much. I don't think I love it; love seems more for God and for people. Something more worthy of love is something with a soul and character, I seem to think. It's just how I am.

Goodness. I'm lecturing on here and to my friend, and I can't seem to separate the two. Just tell me if this is interesting when it is done.

Now, I believe I'll go and find a poem to put on. I don't think I'll have to search long, because if I find the right poem, it sort of... bounces out at me, and I just post it.
Then I write a lecture on it.

Here is a poem I wrote inspired, I believe, by The Seafarer, an Anglo-Saxon poem from the Exeter Book (http://www8.georgetown.edu/departments/medieval/labyrinth/library/oe/exeter.html), and a poem by a friend of mine. And yes, I've mentioned a lot of my friends here. Three or four. :P


Cold eyes, dashing sea,
Breaking through waves,
Nothing in it I can see.
Darkness bitter, tearing waves,
Nothing but the darkest staves
Can clash and break this sea.
Nothing in it I know,
Nothing in it I can tell,
It is darkness all around,
Nothing but the floundering waves
Can I see, swirling around,
Nothing but the darkness grim,
Nothing that I can know.

Lost in waves, struggling,
I try for shore, a little light,
My eyes above the water,
Looking far, seeing light,
The sun on cliffs gleaming gold,
The sun no matter can make old.
There the waves brought me safe,
I came to land and saw the cliffs,
Bright, red-coloured,
Flaming dragon's scales,
Darkness was no more for me.
Darkness passed beyond the east.
Darkness was forever gone.



If you've ever read a translation (or the original language) of The Seafarer, you might see a comparison. Both are at sea, in general, although they have different settings of how you are at sea. I don't know how this one comes into the picture, but in the beginning, the speaker is drowning at sea, or at least in it, to some extent, and is trying to reach shore.

It covers some ideas I've had for stories. The cliffs discussed were a marvelously interesting idea I had. I really liked it. They're cliffs that face the west or something. Could be east, but the sunset seems so much hotter than the sunrise. the sunrise generally looks cool and... golden. Anyways, they're cliffs down to sea, coloured like fire. In my stories, most dragon's known, I think, or more common ones, had fiery-coloured scales. Therefore, there is that connection here. I often see them in my mind when I think or read of them from what I've written, they're actually pretty nice. But blindingly bright, really. I don't know what they're like, but they look beaten, rather like a battened shield, or is the word battened? I like that word because it sounds exactly like the OE... I think, it's quit related. Sounds OE. Love OE. And you know not what OE is. ;)

There, I've ranted. In any case, the cliffs are lovely. I don't think there are cliffs like that anywhere in the world. But it's fantasy.

I'm sorry the post's long. I'm having long thoughts. I should say something sensible, but I've lost all sense because I started staring at the OE Riming Poem int he Exeter Book, linked to above. Love the Exeter Book. I want a nice, fat, leather-bound copy to pour over and read the Anglo-Saxon poems out loud. I love to; Old English is such a beautiful language. I also like to practise my Old English knowledge on speed-translating, or what I call reading, the poems. Because I'm not really translating them. I can read Latin better than Old English because I'm not as rusty on it. I lent my Old English booky thing to a friend of mine across the continent, so I haven't go it now. But she is quite allowed to have it. ;) I'll just be glad when it's back, because... I miss all the words and grammar!

Sense. I will try to succumb to sense.

I think that sometime I should write on definitions and literature.

I think I will now.



If you are at all familiar with foreign literatures, you may know how how words' meanings can be changed to be, well, unmundane. Different than bath meaning a bath. It's hard to explain, but combining words can create meanings far beyond what they may seem. However, some people do not understand what they mean. I'm afraid I pity them. Old English poetry is somewhat broad, and the words they use constantly have senses, or a taste to them.

I can't think of particular words, but the way that words end up deriving into English with different meanings than their Old English derivatives is often, I think, because of the sense of the Old English word. In English, some of our words have almost multiple meanings, rather like multiple personalities, which I like to, insanely, say I have. I can't even think of a particular word to demonstrate, but I think you may get the idea.

There could be an Old English word for deed, let us say, or act, but it has a sense of an evil deed to it, not a good deed, or just a simple neutral deed. Well, I don't really think deeds can be neutral, but think of... the deed of putting away your shoes and then the deed of giving money to some charity. And, often, in OE, that word for deed, if it exists or existed, could come into English as even 'an evil man', or so. It's odd, but that almost illustrates what I mean, but I think that's dreadfully too... strange and far-fetched.

But I have a good one that's been in my mind for weeks now. There is an Old English word, 'wyrd', meaning 'fate, doom'. I believe the sense of this word was very important to the lives of Anglo-Saxons; at least, my English Literature textbook gives that idea, and certainly the Old English poems do as well. You may possibly have guessed that this word, 'wyrd', came into English as 'weird'. You would be correct, as far as I know. I won't say this as a fact because I find I don't trust myself on it, even if my E. Lit. textbook says that, too. I thought so when I first encountered the word in Old English class, however, last schoolyear in my dear ol' OE guide. Well.

Wyrd means doom (I prefer, though doom also comes from Old English... but that is COMPLETELY unimportant here, I must chastise me...), and weird means strange. Fate, or doom, in the Old English poems is looked on as a fateful thing, and is feared, and is, in general, weird. The textbook, and I suppose I should give it credit because it has been mentioned so many times (it is, England in Literature- America reads - classic edition, or something... that's what it says on the front), notes that in Shakespeare's Macbeth, it has the Three Weird Sisters. They symbolise fate, I believe (at least, from what I've gotten so far, and I blame this on the book again), therefore not only being weird. But they certainly are weird.

The word 'wyrd' came into English as 'weird' because fate, or doom, was weird, and the word had the idea as, I think, something that the Anglo-Saxons could in no way foretell.

I should have come to that earlier, but I'm bad at writing essays, so I hope you like this. I've constantly wished to note these things.


Now, I wish to introduce myself a little further. I tend to write my poetry and even writings, or when I'm just writing or speaking to you, somewhat archaically. I am rather an archaic person. I love archaic things, and tend to use words in a very bendable, interesting way. I admit it's interesting; I know it's interesting. I like to write my English like so many things have been written before. Hebrew literature, Greek literature, Anglo-Saxon literature-- they all seem to have it, a strange power of writing, strange senses in words, strange words, and strange ways of writing. That is, to the modern world. I think, to me, it seems normal, because I'm used to it, and very intrigued by it.

I love the Old English word, 'grimm', or at least, like that. It is the derivative of our 'grim', but it is much more intense. It has more of a stern sense, or a darker, grimmer sense, than our grim does. However, I have the big problem of looking at our word as the Old English one, and so I said 'grimmer' there. I'm afraid languages have an influence on me, and it's not easy, and not really hard, to abandon. I hope you understand. 'Stern, fierce, grim.' Think of what the Anglo-Saxons would have imagined when hearing 'grim storm', or their version, probably 'grimm storm'... or so. I can't exactly remember. They probably would have thought of something like a tornado or hurricane, likely, or a gale at sea. Much worse than what we would think of as a grim storm, or a grim day... just a boring, grey day where we sit around as couch potatoes being stewed or smoked in the heat and humidity of summer.

That should sum it for me. Bedtime is soon.

Friday, September 19, 2008

No transliteration...

So. with no transliteration, I will give you all a good poetry-cookout. I have so much of it, and the only place to put it is on the Dearly Classified Writing Club (so-called right now because I feel we'll end up having 40 members soon). Annnd... well, I've got some new and old stuff. So let's have a fun time with poetry. I haven't many short stories, and my stories shan't be posted yet.

So. I'll go search for all the joys of poemhood. And someday, I'm thinking, I should post on Old English. I'm no expert at it, but I know it. You have to rely on Dr. McM for your OEhood. Except, he won't claim expertise either, I don't think. But I'm one of his students, so I'm supposed to be nuts and as, well, smart as a five-year-old.... people say fifth grader, but see, five-year-olds are the ones who depend on their mums for all their knowledge, and they think their parents have infinite knowledge.


This first poem was inspired just now by L.C. Russell of Pontification Ad Nauseam, which I bloglistify to...

Yes Nor No

I cannot say yes, nor no
To any question here,
Oh, how sad life can be
With no right answer?
I would say yes or no
If the time were right,
But they tell me it's not;
I'm bound tight hand and foot.


And I used this to reply to her while talking to her...:

I can't say yes, nor no,
For they say that I can't!
As do you, my friend...
You bind me hand and foot!

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

इफ थिस अप्पार्स इन हिन्दी, आईटी'स नोट माय फौल्ट

Here's an of poemsy. If you don't understand the usage of 'an' there, I'll tell you.... the word 'an' is from the Anglo-Saxon 'án', 'one', and... that generally explains it.

Ta da! --


Now, what a place to go to, my friend!
To the streets of Minn'polis, so drunken, so dead!

Oh, do consider again, if you please;

For this place is not friendly to leaves!
They're sputtered and guzzled and turned to a pulp,
Thrown down the throat with such tyrannical gulp!

The forests are golden and leaves are bright green,
The fields are brown-dark and grasses are green,
The waters are shimm'ring and cloudy and lean.
What does this all mean, what definition?
What can be meant by this old destination?
A place that is contrary to whatever it be,
That certainly does make a little mice wee.

It is a place where there is not a street,
A place where people hardly ever do meet,
A place full of the warnings of woods,
The chastisement giv'n to the one child's 'could'.
'Oh, yes, my child, of course you could, or would!
But, you see, child, 'tisn't could, but 'tis might!'
Such little childrens do not know what's right.

In this forest it is not kept at bay,
The darkness does not creep as long shadows may,
They're pulled back forc'dly by the old trees,
For there are mosses and new ferns to see!
Children who come there do not speak at all,
This is what I am telling you, before fall.

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Salvete!

I have come, for all of you who care or don't.

For those who come, here are some three random poems I wrote:

It was one day that...
This did happen...
My meatball was covered...
When somebody sneezed.
It rolled off the table,
And under the door,
And then my poor meatball,
Was never no more.

--

There was an old woman,
Lived in a shoe.
She had twelve children,
Naught but are blue.
All of the windows
And all of the doors
Were busted here'n'there
Because of the floor.

--

There was an old azure-sky
Covered with stars,
It was so heav'nly,
So very like dye!
But not all the king's men,
Nor the king's horses,
Knew what a star
Was in all their noses!